Trellis + Bedrock + DO + Mutlideveloper + Staging/Prod environments

Goal: Using trellis and bedrock and digital ocean — have 2 developers working on the same wordpress site at the same time — ideally work on their home computers. Deploy changes to a staging environment that later get propagated to the production environment. Have a workflow that keeps everything in sync and resolves the merges of the db and wp-content/uploads and any other aspect of the wordpress site.

What follows is my research and I’m not seeing a straightforward solution…

Two side questions:

If I loose my instance completely — what is the way to restore it? Do I need to keep a copy of my DB and media files (/wp-content/uploads) — is there anything else that needs to be saved — what’s the protocol for version controlling these items?

Is there a way to develop on the Digital Ocean server itself as a staging and then take that back and put it into GIT? I’m thinking that both of us could develop on the digital ocean server but then how would I get all that stuff into GIT? It seems like the digital ocean server might be fast enough to do this and it would eliminate the DB merge problem

Thanks everyone!

---- start research

(Syncs DB Between computers — but not developers)

https://github.com/Twansparant/trellis-db-sync

(programs to possibly merge databases — but I have seen anyone post them merging mysql databases for wordpress)
https://shop.crowdfavorite.com/ramp/ (database merge tool)
http://www.toadworld.com/platforms/mysql/w/wiki/6182.tables-merge (not sure if this tool would work)
https://www.navicat.com/en/
https://sequelpro.com/docs/ref/core-features

Applying queries to DB tables (deploy db script) — this idea seems more reasonable as each of us would keep a deploy sql script in git that I could then apply and push to staging.
https://deliciousbrains.com/avoiding-wordpress-database-merging/
https://github.com/deliciousbrains/wp-query-recorder (records all the queries made to DB on wordpress)
https://wptavern.com/wordpress-query-recorder-plugin-record-and-save-queries-to-a-sql-file-for-deployment

Programs that handle the merge just not sophisticated enough for multi developer environment
https://mergebot.com/

Then the usual plugin — that moves everything but no merge
https://deliciousbrains.com/wp-migrate-db-pro/